so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize