i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
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He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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