Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
