well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
