What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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