Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it

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  (508): If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it http://tfl.nu/rn2p
  Replies (9) Good night (926) Bad night (1219) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".

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  (402): I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis". http://tfl.nu/dn08
  Replies (17) Good night (599) Bad night (6413) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?

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  (405): why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after? http://tfl.nu/ai6n
  Replies (45) Good night (1067) Bad night (5224) Order T-Shirt
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  (559): View more from California

  Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE

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  (559): Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE http://tfl.nu/d6tf
  Replies (48) Good night (8242) Bad night (782) Order T-Shirt
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day

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  (515): we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day http://tfl.nu/zvmb
  Replies (21) Good night (3775) Bad night (753) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.

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  (215): i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history. http://tfl.nu/28mn
  Replies (12) Good night (2652) Bad night (971) Order T-Shirt
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.

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  (641): Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that. http://tfl.nu/2jzp
  Replies (27) Good night (8688) Bad night (3178) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?

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  (317): What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand? http://tfl.nu/ssbm
  Replies (15) Good night (1116) Bad night (4326) Order T-Shirt
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  (713): View more from Texas

  He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.

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  (713): He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5. http://tfl.nu/fdnd
  Replies (8) Good night (2652) Bad night (649) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.

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  (770): Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay. http://tfl.nu/tpqf
  Replies (25) Good night (5844) Bad night (637)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.

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  (717): Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend. http://tfl.nu/7j2q
  Replies (10) Good night (1237) Bad night (585)
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  (661): View more from California

  And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"

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  (661): And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first" http://tfl.nu/snox
  Replies (3) Good night (961) Bad night (622) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.

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  (303): Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth. http://tfl.nu/h368
  Replies (11) Good night (2436) Bad night (326) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.

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  (203): Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed. http://tfl.nu/vekr
  Replies (5) Good night (769) Bad night (415) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks

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  (603): Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks http://tfl.nu/ddr9
  Replies (8) Good night (274) Bad night (507)

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