Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize