We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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