she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
