Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(503): View more from Oregon

So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.

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(503): So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video. http://tfl.nu/od0z

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(305): View more from Florida

i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.

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(305): i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer. http://tfl.nu/jibz

Replies (52) Good night (37425) Bad night (1953)
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(317): View more from Indiana

about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?

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(317): about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight? http://tfl.nu/od5z

Replies (9) Good night (907) Bad night (3622)
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(314): View more from Missouri

last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.

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(314): last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga. http://tfl.nu/5ric

Replies (16) Good night (4082) Bad night (1113)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta

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(337): Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta http://tfl.nu/2wvh

Replies (21) Good night (4551) Bad night (1239)
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(775): View more from Nevada

THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.

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(775): THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL. http://tfl.nu/wgt5

Replies (19) Good night (3725) Bad night (1557)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?

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(403): I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain? http://tfl.nu/msrw

Replies (3) Good night (1893) Bad night (586)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.

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(843): The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover. http://tfl.nu/181u

Replies (17) Good night (1634) Bad night (750)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.

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(303): Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel. http://tfl.nu/tevo

Replies (5) Good night (1033) Bad night (500)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?

(1-404): View more from Georgia

At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.

(404): View more from Georgia

Why did I wake up by myself then?

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(404): Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach? (1-404): At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place. (404): Why did I wake up by myself then? http://tfl.nu/82c4

Replies (3) Good night (1486) Bad night (467)
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(240): View more from Maryland

The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!

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(240): The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different! http://tfl.nu/rsm4

Replies (5) Good night (1228) Bad night (490)
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(314): View more from Missouri

He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto

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(314): He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto http://tfl.nu/i261

Replies (3) Good night (295) Bad night (631)
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(317): View more from Indiana

What's your ideal size in a man?

(765): View more from Indiana

I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......

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(317): What's your ideal size in a man? (765): I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow...... http://tfl.nu/zo79

Replies (5) Good night (810) Bad night (424)
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(625): View more from

You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.

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(625): You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance. http://tfl.nu/hgkc

Replies (1) Good night (351) Bad night (214)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.

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(413): I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do. http://tfl.nu/n7xt

Replies (0) Good night (462) Bad night (139)

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