me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
