Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
