I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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