You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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