So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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