and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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