I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
