if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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