my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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