She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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