would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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