Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Randomize
