I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I came so hard my ears popped.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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