My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
