Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Randomize
