my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Randomize