So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
