Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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