yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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