she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
