what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
