Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
