Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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