i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
