so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
