I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
