is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize