hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do cheetos always look like penises
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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