I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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