you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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