Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Omg I joined a choir last night...
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
