we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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