Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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