Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
