Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
