If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Randomize