Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.

  (407): View more from Florida

  given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was

  (352): View more from Florida

  i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight. (407): given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was (352): i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it http://tfl.nu/tb83
  Replies (41) Good night (3216) Bad night (1116)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits. http://tfl.nu/amvg
  Replies (42) Good night (4976) Bad night (541)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): He's pole dancing on a heat lamp. http://tfl.nu/0l62
  Replies (9) Good night (1368) Bad night (3278) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test. http://tfl.nu/drd9
  Replies (17) Good night (5575) Bad night (1065) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night http://tfl.nu/6buy
  Replies (4) Good night (2387) Bad night (595) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober http://tfl.nu/war3
  Replies (15) Good night (2124) Bad night (779) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling. http://tfl.nu/9r51
  Replies (4) Good night (1853) Bad night (614) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well. http://tfl.nu/a4oz
  Replies (10) Good night (3142) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  What a dumb baby whore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): What a dumb baby whore. http://tfl.nu/17ck
  Replies (4) Good night (1163) Bad night (694) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look. http://tfl.nu/aj1z
  Replies (9) Good night (627) Bad night (869) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back." http://tfl.nu/49s7
  Replies (14) Good night (566) Bad night (2464)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds http://tfl.nu/g7b7
  Replies (5) Good night (812) Bad night (473) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy. http://tfl.nu/piez
  Replies (6) Good night (651) Bad night (263) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty http://tfl.nu/qyka
  Replies (9) Good night (534) Bad night (702) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door? http://tfl.nu/ozrv
  Replies (2) Good night (631) Bad night (170) Order T-Shirt

Randomize