My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
