fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Be still, my beating vagina.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Randomize
