I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
