Texts From Last Night

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  (619): View more from California

  I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.

  (1-619): View more from California

  You literally just made my flesh crawl.

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  (619): I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter. (1-619): You literally just made my flesh crawl. http://tfl.nu/h7tg
  Replies (32) Good night (2066) Bad night (1114)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober

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  (407): Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober http://tfl.nu/epi9
  Replies (19) Good night (855) Bad night (2639)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh

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  (206): If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh http://tfl.nu/j9ko
  Replies (41) Good night (8717) Bad night (931)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"

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  (856): i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty" http://tfl.nu/8yrq
  Replies (45) Good night (4386) Bad night (1314)
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  (585): View more from New York

  okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.

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  (585): okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea. http://tfl.nu/vuoh
  Replies (28) Good night (5630) Bad night (691)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.

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  (330): Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley. http://tfl.nu/14i4
  Replies (16) Good night (1158) Bad night (5172)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.

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  (413): the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings. http://tfl.nu/xbcs
  Replies (11) Good night (9023) Bad night (1010)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.

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  (843): I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower. http://tfl.nu/3pc6
  Replies (15) Good night (4484) Bad night (1857)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line

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  (516): I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line http://tfl.nu/kwv6
  Replies (10) Good night (843) Bad night (3048)
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.

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  (623): I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me. http://tfl.nu/we23
  Replies (5) Good night (1424) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean

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  (715): He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean http://tfl.nu/eek7
  Replies (12) Good night (1955) Bad night (814)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude

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  (303): Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude http://tfl.nu/hmhg
  Replies (4) Good night (1188) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends

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  (517): I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends http://tfl.nu/sky7
  Replies (4) Good night (1411) Bad night (435)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.

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  (619): For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this. http://tfl.nu/nvhn
  Replies (14) Good night (1892) Bad night (525)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.

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  (506): Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals. http://tfl.nu/0nga
  Replies (2) Good night (720) Bad night (227)

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