...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
