So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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