Hey man sorry I got all grabby
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize